I don't know why... i was thinking about you whole morning. Today is Friday... Yes... a Friday. Usually a Friday is a day i like quite much. But today... there's a seminar this morning. So i have to wake up early. And oddly... i wake up on my own. I think had a dream... Yes... i did had a dream. But i was not able to remember what is happening. And i woke up.
I didn't start to miss you until after the Seminar. Because, after the seminar, i walk at Sarawak Plaza... Tun Jugah... And here comes... my memory... They rush in... and i can see you in me. Feels like illusion is playing in front of my eyes. And i had been quiet all along. Trying to forget... Trying not to think. And good thing... my mum was cleaning the house... i was helping. Was busy helping... keep myself as busy as possible... so that i will not think. Yes... it did help...
But when i clean up my room... i saw the things. The items... It came to me... all came to me... Even the ticket for the movie that we had for the first time we date... was still with me... i wonder why i kept it... All came back to me... i see everything again... But still... i manage to throw it into the rubbish bin. I am not good. I am not prepared. I am not the best. But i will try to be the best of me... before i come back for you. I am selfish... I don't want you to burden me up. I am even evil, to let you go and hurt you... Yes... i am bad... I am sorry... But i will try to make up to u... No... is make up to myself... Because... my dream consist of you. Without you in it... it is not a dream anymore. It is not my future anymore... or should i look for a new future???
Not yet... No! i will not give up so easily. Where is the Zechs last time who is not going to give up easily? Who is always prepared for battle? I'm missing you... i'm missing you...
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